by Christina O., Day-Riverside Branch
I love my friends and as a teen I’d spend endless hours hanging out with them doing just about anything and everything. Expressing my feelings and hearing their opinions about situations I was going through and just hanging out, but as a lot of adults know, once you leave high school and enter into “adulthood” making and keeping friends is a super tricky task!
I’m hoping this blog post can help you (and let's be honest myself) learn the importance of friendship, what we should look for in our friend, what we should look for in a friend, and how we can keep our friends close even as we get older and our life shifts!
So here is the most obvious question ever: Why is friendship so important as you get older?
Well according to helpguide.org “Friends bring more happiness into our lives than virtually anything else.Friendships have a huge impact on your mental health and happiness. Good friends relieve stress, provide comfort and joy, and prevent loneliness and isolation. Developing close friendships can also have a powerful impact on your physical health.”
That's great, but you might be asking: how do I keep my friends as my busy life continues to chug along?
Well, I always like to work backwards. I like to ask myself what made this person and I connect? How do I keep that connection strong and able to evolve? How does this person like to communicate? Is texting their preferred way of communication or should I give them a call?
Answering these questions can help you establish better relationships and understanding with your friends, help you get closer, and stay friends for years to come!
So, if you have a friend that you soley communicate with on Snapchat for example maybe instead of a text message you can do a video snap where you can show them your face or what you are doing throughout the day. I’ve actually been doing this with my best friend Ashely and it’s been so nice to see her face and hear about her day!
So now that you know the benefits of having friends and you've got some tips on how to start the communication process, here's another question. What makes a good friend? Not to be that guy, but you gotta look out for yourself! Remember it’s important to look for people who have your best interest in mind and you enjoy being around.
At the end of the day it’s important that your friendship helps you and not hinders you from being your true self!
Now you may be wondering “ what do I do? I'm shy!” Don’t worry I got you covered!
Okay let's start with making new friends, from my experience It’s so much easier to let people talk about themself. Ask open ended questions about hobbies, music and what you do after school and if a subject comes up that you enjoy, voice it!
An important factor of being a good friend and/ or starting a new friendship is paying attention to what your current/potential friend has to say. That is half the battle!
Remember to be open minded and willing to share your own experiences. You’re sure to get a connection but, if you aren’t interested in what they have to say and don’t see yourself hanging out with that person it’s totally okay to move on. Just remember to be nice about it!
It doesn't mean that you or they are bad at meeting people or making friends. Sometimes it’s just not meant to be and that's okay! According to google there are about 7.753 billion (2020) people on the earth so you have options. Just remember to be kind to them and yourself!
Alright buddy, lets review:
by Yoli, Marmalade Branch
Here are some ways to help:
Resources and Articles that Support Teen Mental Health:
A list of organizations that are Helping Ukrainians On-the-Ground, and In Neighboring Countries.
by Christina, Day-Riverside Branch
There will be times when you will encounter difficult situations; it could be with friends, family, or in the dating world. I hope that I can give you some resources to better understand what boundaries are and how to use them to keep yourself safe and true to who you are.
So, what are boundaries?
Boundaries are limits you establish in order to protect yourself from being hurt, manipulated, or taken advantage of. It also is an expression of self-worth! Boundaries can let other people know who you are, what your values are, and how you want to be treated.
It’s important to note that boundaries are different for everyone, when done right, they will help you set limits with others. Learning how to set boundaries can help you understand your limits within all of your relationships.
So, how would you set boundaries?
You may run into a variety of different scenarios in your relationships. You may have a friend or sibling who keeps borrowing clothes and not giving them back. You may have a friend who likes to tease people behind their back and you would like no part of it. You may have a friend that keeps borrowing money and not paying you back. These are all scenarios where setting boundaries can be useful.
Here are some tips for setting boundaries:
Find your feelings!
Learning to recognize and label different feelings is definitely not as easy as it may sound. It will take work and practice to stop and think about how you are feeling in any given situation. Being able to pinpoint how you are feeling is the first step in setting boundaries.
Trust Your Gut!
You should always trust your intuition. If something feels off or wrong about a situation, it probably is. You aren’t being dramatic or overly sensitive regardless of what the other people say. You need to be true to who you are and not what someone else expects you to be.
Key Phrase you can use and practice
Setting boundaries can be hard and takes a lot of practice. It is something that requires some thought and decision making. Here are some key phrases that can give you some time to think about your next decision. “Let me think about it and get back to you,” “No thanks. I’m not comfortable with that,” or “let me talk to my parents about that and let you know tomorrow”
Keep in mind that you may run into many different situations throughout your life that challenge your values and beliefs and knowing how to set boundaries can be an important part of growing as an individual. I have attached resources for boundary setting in romantic relationships, real teens telling their stories and self worth building.
Love Is Respect -non profit organization that addresses dating abuse with young people.
By Claire, Anderson-Foothill Branch
Dyslexia. (2017, July 22). Retrieved February 21, 2021, from https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/dyslexia/symptoms-causes/syc-20353552#:~:text=Dyslexia%20is%20a%20learning%20disorder,the%20brain%20that%20process%20language.
Danaadmin. (2020, December 15). Searching for effective interventions in dyslexia. Retrieved February 21, 2021, from https://dana.org/article/searching-for-effective-interventions-in-dyslexia/
Dyslexia's emotional impact. (2020, August 20). Retrieved February 21, 2021, from https://www.lexercise.com/blog/dyslexia-effects
by Becca, Main Library
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it’s important to remember to love and celebrate yourself first!
Check out these books to get some inspiration for ways to boost your self-love and acceptance.
by Trinity, Main Teen Squad
Hello! Firstly, I’d like to introduce myself and why I did this project.
My name is Trinity and I’m an LGBT+ teen that has been out to themselves for a few years, so when I was thinking about the next project that I could do with the library for Teen Squad, one of the main things I thought about was, “what is something that I know about that I as a teenager didn’t know before, and wish I did?” And that’s when it hit me that I gather information as a hobby and I have a store of info on LGBT+ representation, resources, and tips, so that is what I made my project out of.
The way to access my project is on Instagram on an account with the username @rainbow_community_resources and there are quite a bit of different things to be found to help anyone that is looking to get started on the journey that is getting support, loving who you are, finding people like you, and doing it all safely.
The specifics of what can be found there are sectioned into categories. Those categories are YouTuber representation, representation in general, binder tips (for the trans masculine/non-binary folks), hotlines/phone numbers, institutions/corporations that are either LGBT+ safe or built for LGBT+ people, and finally a deeper dive into some of those institutions.
All YouTuber representations are people that are healthy successful people that are openly advocating for people like them and in turn people in the LGBT+ community, and all of the examples of general representation are authors or companies that put out healthy and constructive content for your viewing pleasure. All hotlines/phone numbers are specifically for LGBT+ people and many are for mental health, and all binder tips have been researched and triple checked to ensure safety. And on top of all of that we still have institutions and deep dives on institutions that are LGBT+ based, supporting, and open to all. And all of these posts were hand drawn on my digital drawing platform to make it feel more personalized.
So with all that letting you know what to expect when you get there, I sincerely hope you check the account out, share it with LGBT+ friends and use it to help yourself, your friends, or anyone else trying to get started on this roller coaster of pride.
Blog posts are written by our Teen Librarians and, in some cases, teens like you. Visit your About page to learn more about our Teen Librarians.